By: Matt Alexander
Remember that Tom Cruise movie that went by the same name as a series of Brendan Frasier movies? Well, it’s okay that you don’t. The former was made into an equally forgettable video game, but, just like all Tom Cruise movies, it’s worth a few hours to watch a miniature guy run around doing stunts.
That game is “The Mummy: Demastered”. Graphically it is very much like Metal Slug or even Contra, but the gameplay is total Metroidvania. There are no pesky lag times from low frame-rate (until there are), so those infinitely-spawning enemies can keep coming to knock you off those minuscule platforms and send you back down the perilous vertical shafts that have by now given you an aneurysm. It’s totes fun for everyone.
An almost passable storyline complete with interrupting guide make for a decent time. Mummy chick summons monsters, you kill said monsters, you gather a few upgrades, and you eventually take on mummy chick [spoiler alert].
If you die, your corpse becomes undead and the next nameless agent you play as must retrieve your weapons and upgrades from said zombified corpse. Oh, and you start back up with no equipment, so good luck progressing in the game. Everything else is only moderately difficult for a platformer.
But the 16-bit style and mood-altering music are nice! All in all, it is at least not the very worst way to spend $15.
6/10 BroFists (3 + mummy bandages + ammo crates + “I’m not mad, just disappointed”)